A lot of people are setting off fireworks as we get close to the holiday. I hear a lot of boom-booms in the evenings.
Last night I heard sirens as well.
Seems a gentleman (not Bob) up the street entertaining friends decided to mix fireworks with alcohol and a cigar and learned the hard way they don’t mix.
The best I can figure, based on what the witnesses said, he had a big box of fireworks sitting under a table on his patio. He would pull out some firecrackers or a rocket every so often and set then off.
Having had one or two too many, he managed to spill his 160 proof drink on the table where it ran down and dripped into the box of fireworks.
He grabbed some napkins from the table to clean up the mess but dropped his cigar in the process – right on the wet spot on the table.
Woosh!
Flaming drink raced across the table and dripped down into the box.
In a matter of seconds, that whole box went off sounding like a live-fire exercise at a machine gun convention but with the visual effects of bottle rockets zooming everywhere added in.
His buddies sprinted for the hills and left him staggering in circles trying to figure out what to do while in an alcoholic haze.
Finding himself at the patio door he decided the smart thing to do would be to open it and go inside to get away from the conflagration on his patio.
A large rocket followed him in and crashed into the refrigerator where his wife was pulling out a plate of steaks to cook, causing her to drop it.
Other than his shorts nearly catching on fire from the rocket zooming by, he and his house didn’t suffer too much damage except for a shattered platter of steaks.
Oh, and someone called the police and the fire department. That’s where the sirens came from.
By the time they got there the fire on the table and in the box had burned themselves out.
I understand his explanation to the police wasn’t very convincing, and so they took him away for the night.
His wife went to stay with her mother for a day or two.
His friends? They went elsewhere to continue the party.
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